Thursday, July 21, 2011

Flash Fiction // Remembering Train Car Six

I challenged readers and writers who visit The Farthest Reaches to write a little flash story based on the prompt, "A forgetful character starts discovering actions made in his favour at some point in the past. The only catch? He honestly can't remember doing them himself. Funny, sad, poignant or horrific, have fun with it. No character limit, but maybe anywhere from 200 up to a couple thousand. You're the boss of the story. Er. Well, the story's more likely the boss of you, but don't feel limited."

I promised I would write my own and include it. Sadly, I'm lousy at writing flash fiction under 200 words. I started writing a story that I *thought* would be about 3-400 words in length and here it is, all 1500 words of it.

Luckily, I really like it. I think I'll edit it (this is strictly first draft stuff below!) and include it in an anthology somewhere down the road. I would love to know what you think of it -- and how well I addressed my own prompt.


This story will remain up until Sunday. So read it while you can!



UPDATE: Sunday, July 24, 2011 2:30 PM CST


The short story has been removed, and I'm pleased to report that while it was up it garnered just over 800 hits!  I want to sincerely thank all my friends and peers for reading the story, leaving comments, re-tweeting some mentions on Twitter about it and generally sending good vibes out into the Farthest Reaches.

The last story I posted in this manner garnered about 500 hits so the 800 for this story is a phenomenal increase. I hope that readers got at least a modicum of entertainment value from reading the tale. Remember to read some of my guests flash stories based on the same prompt.

Thanks, everyone!

j. //

21 comments:

  1. I'm the Jason from circa 1951.

    Thanks for reading, Marty!

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  2. Outstanding as always, Jason! Would love to have more...but that is me, always greedy.

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  3. You WILL have more, Kimba! As you already know (but others may not), my short story collection BLACK LIGHT OF DAY will be hitting bookstore shelves soon.

    As always, thanks for reading and coming out to the Farthest Reaches to play!

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  4. What a cool, powerful piece, Jason. Very nice!

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  5. Aww, thanks, Larry! That means a lot coming from you. Thanks so much for taking the time to read and comment.

    Everyone who hasn't read Larry's piece based on the same prompt should head over to the original post and read it in the comments section.

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  6. Love it, Jason. But... WHY did the train get blown to pieces? Which has nothing to do with what you're doing. I'm just curious.

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  7. Sometimes in life, Susan, we don't always get to know the reason why bad things happen. :)

    Seriously, though, I think we can surmise from the involvement of Interpol that it was perhaps a terrorist bombing. The thing in Norway just happened so maybe that was on my mind when I wrote this piece.

    Love that you came by to read and comment, Susan!

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  8. Holy crap, this was scary, and for such a short piece - it really had me on edge.
    I bow down to your mastery of fear mongering.

    Great piece J!
    eden

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  9. An engaging, powerful read!And I think you addressed the prompt perfectly. Great job! Glad I got to read this before you took it down!

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  10. Eden! So glad you think there was an edge to this. I find the quicker it's written, the more powerful it can end up being, at least for my writing.

    Thanks for reading and spending time to comment!

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  11. Lisa! Thanks for reading. It means a lot that you could stop by. I don't threaten to take it down to be a meanie -- just to see if I can get as many talented and interested folks to have a gander at it, before it's way old news.

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  12. You have such a powerful writing style! I love it. You work just amazes me.

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  13. Hi Dianna, I really appreciate your positive feedback. Keeps me going!

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  14. Wow. Very moving and powerful. I felt as if I were there experiencing it. I am not usually a fan of first person as it tends to read as a list - but not here. Thank you for sharing this.

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  15. Carrie, thanks so much for reading it and sharing your thoughts. Wanna know a secret? Until about four years ago, I *loathed* first person narration of any kind. I found many authors used it as a bit of a cheat, a cop-out. Some, I've discovered, use it very well.

    My hope is to learn from the process of writing first person stories. In fact, I'm writing an entire novel in this style right now: the first instalment of The Night Walk Men.

    Again, thanks for swinging by!

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  16. I really enjoyed this story, Jason. It surprised me, shocked me, and made me realise once again how wonderfully talented you are.
    Looking forward to the short story collection :)

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  17. My thanks, Maria! I love that I can "shock" you as a reader, even just a little bit.

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  18. Awesome story, Jason. I remember reading somewhere (no idea where) that we should embrace things like traffic jams and last minute phone calls that make us run late. Perhaps there is a reason we were not supposed to be on that highway or at our office five minutes earlier. Your story reminded me of that.

    To answer your question, you did a - dare I say it - brilliant job of addressing your prompt.

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  19. Yes, Darcia, The Night Walk Men novelette addresses this "tiny-adjustments-to-fate" idea as well. I think of this notion every time I fumble my keys out of my hand when I'm late for work, or at each ridiculously long red light that wasn't as long yesterday at this time.

    Thanks for dropping the 'B' word, my dear. Do I deserve it? Naw. But it's so much fun now as a running joke from you!

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  20. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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